Miss Manners would call it a graceful and traditional yes, traditional way of solving such problems. Perhaps in lieu of leaving a redundant phone number, we can all promise to leave our full names, clearly spelled and pronounced. Miss Manners’ hope is that no matter the profession of your brazen new friend, they will easily be able to relate to the objection of providing free labor. What to do GENTLE READER: Take the cop-out, as you call it. GENTLE READER: If Miss Manners approved only conventions that were practical, rather than old-fashioned and unnecessary ones, she would have far fewer useless silver Victorian gadgets cluttering her desk. I’m sure that you, as an overworked and exhausted (insert asker’s occupation) understand how precious any time away from work is.” GENTLE READER: And that right there is the polite way to say no: “I am very sorry, but Scott is just so busy right now, he doesn’t have any extra time - even to help out a friend. He has no interest in doing their work in any manner - not for free or for money. He always ends up saying yes, resentfully, and now he doesn’t want to make any new friends at all because they all seem to want to use him as their personal handyman. What is a polite way to say no? We feel especially uncomfortable when we know someone is not in a good place financially. But a handwritten response is always better - if only to show that the guests are less gauche than their money-grubbing hosts.ĭEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband is very handy, and works for himself flipping houses and doing construction.Įvery time we get close to new people, they seem to expect him to fix their home needs: leaking plumbing, doors that stick, any home maintenance that they don’t know how to handle. A text is probably fine, given the casual circumstances. GENTLE READER: “Coin shower”? And this, Miss Manners is to understand, is only the warm-up to the “cash tsunami” that is the wedding? How charming.īut you only asked about how to send your reply.
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